Detention, Miss Weasley
by NotYourAverageSchoolgirl
Summary: (One-shot)Ginny's stuck with Snape in (horrors of horrors) a Saturday detention. Will her incessant ramblings get her avada'd? What happens when she talks about snogging Harry? And whaaat...! Snape and Sinistra? A random little gift fic for my dahh-ling r


**Breaking away from my angsty one-shots and trying out an absolutely nonsensical humorous one. Hope it makes you smile!**

**Review if you like it. In fact, if you don't like it, review as well. I could use the constructive criticism. **

**Okay, so this serves as a little present to all my reviewers. I love you dearly, and so this is for YOU. Enjoy!**

Ginny Weasley was terribly outraged.

There were many unjust things in the world and she knew it. There were children starving, house elves without rights, and horribly promiscuous girls who attracted the attention of every boy. But at this moment, there was one injustice that stood out in her mind, one that made her want to scream and flail her arms about in fury.

And that thing was... spending a Saturday detention with Severus Snape.

Yes, our poor heroine had unfairly been imprisoned in the dark, dank dungeons of the beak-nosed Potions professor. And what had the poor girl done to deserve this?

"Miss Weasley, would you mind telling me why you have that ridiculous grin on your face?"

"_Oh, I'm just having a great day professor!" Ginny replied chirpily, smiling sweetly in hopes that Snape wouldn't catch on._

_Almost..._

"_Well," Snape snapped, "Wipe that smile off. You have no right to be happy when you're in my class." _

_He walked towards the front of the classroom, pausing to sneer as he looked into the cauldrons of several quaking students. Suddenly, a loud tapping sounded on the window. Snape furrowed his forehead in confusion as he walked over to unlatch the window._

"_What?" he mused, "I never receive mail."_

_As soon as he opened the window, a flock of owls suddenly rushed into the classroom, startling him. They zoomed about the classroom, dropping what appeared to be pieces of parchment. At first, Snape didn't see it. But when he picked one moving picture up and realized that it was a picture of him (well, the boggart actually) in Neville's grandmother's clothing, he narrowed his eyes in fury. _

_Ginny couldn't help it. She burst into laughter as she watched Snape turn very, very red._

_He suddenly whipped around to face her, his expression deadly. "DETENTION MISS WEASLEY!" _

Oh, it wasn't that bad. Not bad enough to warrant a Saturday detention, anyway. Ginny pouted. It wasn't as if she had meant to humiliate him in front of all his students. No, not at all. She had merely aimed to, erm... showcase the brilliant composition of the photos. Yes, that was it.  
Brilliant composition, really. The lighting and bright colors and the, erm, wonderful subject matter were so lovely that she just _had_ to share those photos with the whole class! Really.

It had nothing to do with the fact that she was _unfairly_ failing that greasy excuse of a professor's class.

Really.

Her shoes clicked against the cold tile of the dungeons as she made her way tentatively towards Snape's classroom for a _delightful_ six hours of detention, even though she was supposed to be spending the day with Harry.

Oh joy.

Just outside the door to his classroom, she straightened herself up, putting a ridiculously large grin on her face that she _knew_ he would find terribly irritating.

Well, if he was going to make _her_ miserable, she should at least be able to annoy him incessantly.

Stepping into the room with her hands behind her back, she grinned at Professor Snape, skipping over to his desk. "Good morning, Professor!" she chirped, skipping about in a circle and "accidentally" bumping into that one desk where all of his newly brewed potions sat. "Oh!" she gasped dramatically, widening her eyes as one of the potions crashed to the floor and spilled everywhere. "I'm so sorry, Professor!" She looked at Snape with wide innocent eyes.

He glared at her, his left eye twitching as he gritted his teeth, glancing over at the potion on the floor.

And with that she crumpled to the floor and wailed loudly. "I'm a terrible person, I know! You hate me! You hate me, you hate me, you hate me!" She peeked through her fingers and noticed with satisfaction that Snape's left eye was twitching even more violently now.

Hah. Served the slimy old git right! He wanted to give her a six-hour detention? Well, fine. She'd simply make the next six hours for him absolutely _miserable._

"Honestly Miss Weasley," Snape finally said crossly, apparently completely unsure as to how to deal with volatile females. "Do calm yourself. I do _not_," and here he twitched again, "hate you."

She sniffled dramatically, looking up at him with wide, innocent eyes. "Oh professor," she gushed loudly, wiping at the tears on her cheeks, "I'll try to be good, I promise. Oh professor! I always knew you weren't as horrible and cross as you seemed. I _know_," she curved her lips upward into that angelic little smile, "that deep down inside, you're a nice man, just like Gilderoy Lockhart."

Snape looked as if he were about to have a heart attack. He sputtered, grimaced, and finally clenched his teeth together, gripping the edge of his desk violently.

Ginny smirked to herself in satisfaction.

"I know I can talk to you know!" she squealed in a high, delighted voice. "Because you understand, don't you professor? You're a good person with a good heart, but," she wrinkled her nose in distaste, "terribly dirty hair."

Snape narrowed his eyes, running a hand through his hair self-consciously.

"Oh don't worry about it," she continued. "It's not as if Professor Sinistra will care." She winked for good measure.

Snape paled noticeably. "You don't mean," he finally managed to choke out, "That you think that Professor Sinistra and _I_..."

He trailed off, apparently sickened by the mere thought.

"Oh professor," Ginny smiled kindly, "I've seen the way you look at her." She grinned, adding, "If you ask me, it's terribly _romantic_." She covered her mouth with a hand, giggling innocently as she joked, "Oh I bet she'd say that your relationship is positively written in the _stars_."

Oh, but he was going to regret ever giving _her_ detention. She inwardly congratulated herself on saying such a terribly sickening statement, especially since she'd noticed that Professor Sinistra and Snape didn't particularly get along. Actually, they were practically snapping each other's heads off at every turn. Snape would _die_ from embarrassment.

As she predicted, Snape's cheeks flared up-

_Hmm_, she thought, _I never knew he could blush. Shame I don't have a camera; that image would make for wonderful blackmail material._

-And he pressed his lips together in a thin line. Apparently, he was far too upset to even _say_ anything.

After a very tense silence (during which Ginny pretended to obliviously hum cheerily), he finally spoke very curtly, "Miss Weasley, scrub the desks clean without magic."

She complied, skipping over to grab a bucket of soapy water and a sponge. She settled herself by the first student desk, dipping the sponge into the water and scouring the desk with vigor.

She watched out of the corner of the eye as Snape visibly relaxed, apparently under the impression that now that she was working away, she wouldn't bother him with her lovely little comments.

_Well_, she smirked as she turned her head away, _He's wrong. _

"You know," she remarked nonchalantly as she continued to run the sponge over the desk. "You don't have to deny that you're attracted to Professor Sinistra-"

Behind her, she heard the clattering of a quill dropping and smiled with satisfaction.

"-It's obvious that it's just sexual tension."

Silence.

She dipped the sponge into the bucket again, humming to herself.

"Miss Weasley." Snape finally spoke up, his words obviously forced. "Please desist from making comments about my love life."

"Oh, of course, professor."

She continued cleaning, moving onto another desk. Glancing at the clock, she waited five minutes (giving Snape plenty of time to relax and therefore be caught off guard later) and spoke up again.

"Guess what professor?"

She ignored the fact that he didn't reply and simply continued.

"The other week, Harry and I went to Hogsmeade and he _kissed_ me for the first time. Harry's such a sweet boy," she sighed dramatically, glancing out of the corner of her eye to notice that Snape looked rather sick.

It was rather obvious that Harry wasn't exactly his favorite person.

"Do you know how he asked me out? We were at Quidditch practice one day, after we'd beaten the Slytherins of course-"

Snape was most definitely grimacing now.

"-And after practice, the rest of the team went back to the Gryffindor Common Room. But Harry said he wanted to grab a butterbeer from the kitchens first, and he asked me if I'd go with him," Ginny smiled to herself genuinely as she recalled this particularly fond memory. "So anyways, I followed him, and when we got to the painting of the bowl of fruit he looked particularly nervous and I didn't know why. We went inside, and all of a sudden, all the house elves popped out carrying all these cakes and sweets with our names on them," she giggled, recalling how Harry had blushed and stammered out an explanation, "And then he told me that he really liked me, and asked me to go out with him. Of course I said yes."

At this point, Snape looked to be on the verge of telling her to leave.

_Rather like the time that Lavender tried to give him advice about cleaning his hair_, Ginny mused.

Apparently, Professor Snape was not a huge fan of girl talk.

It was a shame, really.

He really could've used Lavender's advice.

Suddenly, a figure swept into the room, and Ginny noted with delight that it was Professor Sinistra.

The woman ran a hand through her dark curls and gave Ginny a grin. "Oh poor dear," she placed her hands on her hips, turning to glare at Snape. "Has Sev made you serve a Saturday detention?"

Ginny blinked, fighting the urge to snicker.

_Sev?_

"Were you the one who owled in all those pictures of him, then?" Professor Sinistra let out a chuckle, much to Snape's dismay. "I must commend you on that, Miss Weasley. Well I must say," her eyes twinkled, "You must take after the twins then. Ten points to Gryffindor."

Ginny grinned back at her astronomy professor, deciding that the woman was _definitely _now one of her favorite professors.

"What?" Snape sounded furious. "How dare you grant her points for disrespecting a professor? You horrid, unprofessional, incompetent excuse of a professor!"

Sinistra seemed unfazed as she simply rolled her eyes. "He really does love me," she explained to Ginny.

Ginny's mouth fell open as she gazed wide-eyed at this comment. "Oh..." she managed to utter. She had been right, even though she had only been joking! It was insane, it was unfathomable, and it was absolutely _wonderful_.

She bit back her grin. Oh, but she was going to have wonderful blackmail material with this.

Sinistra walked over to the girl, completely ignoring Snape. Pulling a picture out of the pocket of her robe, she handed it to a surprised Ginny.

"Here," she said warmly, handing over the picture. "This is for you. If he ever gives you detention again, remind him that you have this, okay?" She winked at Ginny, grinning as she whispered, "His mother gave it to me."

Ginny held the photograph, dazed. There was a young Snape... Apparently the picture had been taken in the seventies, when purple bellbottom pants were popular. "Thank you," she managed to say finally, "Thank you so much professor."

Snape was sputtering with horror.

"Now," Sinistra gave the girl a pat on the shoulder. "You can run off now and leave me alone with Sev."

As Ginny exited the room, she heard behind her, "YOU EVIL CONNIVING WITCH! I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR GIVING MY EMBARRASSING PICTURES TO DISRUPTIVE PUPILS!"

"Well," Sinistra's voice calmly responded, "Then I suppose I'll just have to hunt down Lockhart and have a nice snog with him, eh?"

A brief silence.

And then Snape's grudging reply, "No wait...I'll forgive you."

And Ginny Weasley grinned.

Bounding up the stairs, she finally stopped at the fat lady's portrait and breathlessly muttered the password, stepping through the portrait hole and into the Common Room cheerfully.

Harry Potter sat near the fireplace, playing a game of wizard's chess with Ron. At her entry, he looked up in surprise.

"Ginny!" he appeared perplexed as he glanced at the clock. "You've only been in detention for half an hour. I thought you were supposed to be in there for six hours."

"Well," she smirked, walking over to him. "He really couldn't stand having me around for that long. And besides, I discovered his and Professor Sinistra's relationship, so he can never give me detention ever again."

Both boys widened their eyes in surprise, but after a moment, Harry's face broke into a grin.

He reached out and pulled her into his lap, kissing her cheek fondly. "You're the most intelligent, devious witch around, did you know that?"

She grinned, leaning against him with a happy sigh. "Yes," she turned to face him, "And that's why you love me."

"Of course," he replied without hesitation, and leaned in to kiss her.

And the happy couple snogged away, perfectly content as they enjoyed their own little 'happily ever after'.


End file.
